Stop Being Average And Get The Results You Want By Doing These 15 Hard Things.
1. Results Oriented People Will Be Whoever They Need To Be To Get The Job Done.
I had a big pitch meeting coming up and caught my programming working against me. I realized I wanted to be liked in these pitches and not dubbed by the prospect as the “pushy sales guy”. Then I thought, who is the salesperson who does everything they can to win deals? What programming do they have?
I dug in and re-programmed myself to act in this state:
“You’ve done this 10,000 times.”
“I don’t care about your feelings, and whether you like me or not at the end of this call — that doesn’t serve either of us well.”
“I’m here to sell you my services because I’m the best at what I do and my services are the best at getting you results. You lose if you don’t achieve your results so I’m doing you a favor by not letting you off the phone until we get deep into why you’d let this opportunity pass you by.”
If you want to get deep on your results and interested to have me coach you, hop on my calendar here for a strategy call.
The results oriented rise to the occasion, and put themselves in the most difficult of situations because they know it’s the only way to get results.
Then they adapt and upgrade using their state of mind by acting how they need to act to get the results they need to get whether they “are that or not”.
I’m now the pushy sales guy, not the cool nice guy who doesn’t want to sell you.
Why? Because I know what prospects need to be sold.
More than friendliness, they want confidence. Confidence to constructively use tension without being pushy.
More than likability, they want people to show them the way. Give them the answer and get them results.
Is it ideal to choose to be one or the other? No — I too would rather be the “chill nice guy” who’s liked. It’s easier to be that way.
But I’m results oriented and want to make sales so I do it.
Ironically, the prospect wins anyway because that’s usually what people want (to be sold things that add to themselves and make them better) and often need to be pushed to stop from blocking themselves.
I ask myself “what would the best salesperson ever do before a call” and then I get in that state and prepare.
2. Results Oriented Commit Themselves To Live Their Ideals Every Single Day Religiously
The average stand for ideals but don’t commit to practicing them every day. I have so many brilliant friends who don’t break through because good enough is fine.
One of my clients is a brilliant investment banker who’s worked to the ground, he swears he wants to not be unhealthy or stressed from his brutal banking job and swears he doesn’t have time for anything.
I told him to take 10–15 minutes to read his favorite book each morning to start his day better and to try waking up 30 minutes earlier to do so and not run out of his house rushed.
That one addition to his morning would have transformed his life but he refused to do it. He wouldn’t discipline himself to even try.
I’ll be firing him soon unless he begins trying instead of the status quo which is a reactive and stressful existence simply due to not making an ounce of effort.
If he wanted results, he’d turn his life upside down to get it done and he’d do it every single day. When he’d begin doing it, and started to see results, he’d begin enjoying it. Then he’d get deeper with it, and do it even more and fall in love with it until it became a part of who he is and automatic.
3. Results Oriented Sacrifice Likability By The Majority So They Connect With The Right People
The question you should ask yourself is not whether or not you’ll be “likable” or “respected”, rather, the question you should ask is “what connects with others deeply?” or “which few would love you.”
Some nuance to this one as likability and respect certainly aren’t mutually exclusive and noone advises being disliked for it’s own sake.
But rather stand for something unapologetically, at the risk of alienating others. They won’t matter to you anyway and in any endeavor you’re always aiming to reach the minority super fans, not the majority of passive fans.
Donald Trump has half or more of the country who hates him, but the other half or more love him — and that’s how he won the presidency. By going all in and standing up for his style and decisions every day.
4. Results Oriented Don’t Feel Vulnerable Because Their Necessity and Environment Give Them The Courage To Share All
To the results oriented, recognizing vulnerability is what creates it in the first place.
They focus on the necessity and goal, which forces the courage to create the right context to be vulnerable.
Therefore the results oriented share openly because they know the only way to overcome fear is by facing it and channeling it effectively.
Therefore to the results oriented, sharing openly is a normal part of daily life and understanding emotions and feelings is what gives them the courage to become vulnerable (according to this Ted Talk by Dr. Brene Brown)
These are the writers who share their challenges to tell a story or teach a lesson every single day, or teachers who share their personal struggles with students to teach them lessons.
It’s not that they share vulnerability, it’s that they do it with humility.
If you find enough meaning to be courageous, you will be. Get over the hump of worrying about what others think and overcome the fear of being vulnerable. It’s a must and needs to overcome so you can express yourself and share your truth.
How do I know this? Because I overcame my own biggest fear out of necessity and openly shared it (and do so every day in my writing) in my most viral piece here.
5. Results Oriented Work Hard To See The World For Themselves And Recognize The Existence Of Duality
They program themselves, and try hard to not be programmed by external things they can’t control.
They want to want what they want to want and know their identity is whatever they want it to be.
Not what their parents conditioned them to want as a kid growing up or what society thinks they should be or want.
They know the “truth” is only as “truthful” as the receiver perceives it to be, which is based on the defined identity of the perceiver which can change.
Thereofore there’s no real such thing as truth because truths are subjective.
Whatever you think you want, want.
Whoever you think you should be, be it.
Your identity is malleable and can be changed just be believing it can be changed. Therefore statements like “be yourself” or “stick to your roots” aren’t valid.
Because they can be whatever you want them to be at any given time.
And, the answer is never in one thing. You can’t want sunny days all the time because without darkness, there couldn’t be light.
Without pain, there couldn’t be joy.
The vacation wouldn’t be fun without living where you do and the country home wouldn’t be enjoyable without the suburban or urban day to day.
You do yourself or the person no favors by judging anything or anyone. It’s just a bad habit.
6. Results Oriented Catch Bad Programming and Manage Their Reaction Patterns
They choose to perceive everything that happens in a way that optimistically serves them and moves them toward their results.
They are aware of their limiting beliefs and know how to properly evaluate themselves.
For example, if they catch themselves in a common belief we all overlook every day like “I’m not good at tech” or “I’m not a numbers guy” — they catch it and know that it’s because they haven’t spent proper focus and energy on those things and could.
In a nutshell, they catch bad programming.
This is not to say they delude themselves when “bad” things happen, to the contrary.
The results oriented know that they’re already successful, because they’re human who can imagine a goal and achieve it.
This leads them an optimistic worldview they have agency over, however they go head first into feedback to learn from it so they can be guided back in the right direction.
7. Results Oriented Manage Their Attention Like Their Life Depends On It
They know to create their own reality in this world of distraction, they need space and solace.
They protect this precious and limited resource. A fresh morning is a gift to be taken advantage of. So they cherish it like it’s their last, and thereby ascribe so much meaning to their mornings which becomes meaningful days and then a meaningful life.
This can be your night as well and can be times during the day where you re-set.
The results oriented likely meditate or have some form of meditative practice though they strive to act in a meditative manner.
They know if they live and act in meditation, their faith will have efficacy and they’ll get what they want.
Manage your attention as you’d ideally aspire to every morning, to live your ideals each day — and you’ll live your ideal life.